I haven't written for a long time - this is true. Life is soooo full and it is amazing how I say to myself, "Write today!" And I don't. A bit of laziness on my part, a bit of cowardness, a bit of self conscientiousness, and a lot of - what do I write?
But, today, I read my sister's blog - she is an awesome writer, mom, wife, sister, daughter, and everything else - (it is hard to follow that act!) - and I cried, because I remember really, really, really how blessed I am.
I have family members who haven't talked to other family members for years - and I would venture a guess, that those members have no idea why they don't talk anymore.... but the waste of such hard hearts toward each other and the resentment that is harbored in hearts... why, it is sinful! Full of murder - murder of the rich relationships and the loving memories that could have been....
I am blessed, however, to have a family member that enriches my life incredibly and makes me burst with pride. Not only is my sister beautiful on the outside, but she is full of love and compassion. Is generous. Enjoys life. Loves the Lord, her husband, her children, and those around her with great passion, and blows me away with her mature insight into the human pysche.
When I was 10, I prayed for a sister. I had three brothers. I was the oldest. Everyone around me had a sister it seemed but me. I longed for a sister with all my soul. I would cry at night, asking God why I didn't have a sister. I begged him for one - probably made a deal with him, too, for one. Until... when I turned 14, my mother announced that at 42 years old, she was going to have a baby! Her youngest was eight! Not a "whoops" baby - but a prayed for baby by the sister who coveted such a gift from the Lord. And I got that gift. It has been my greatest gift (other than my salvation) from God or anyone else! And like every gift that is a treasure, I hope that I have taken care of this gift with my love and attention and care.
Today I read my sister's blog, then, and I am reminded of this gift I got so long ago and realize that this is the gift that keeps on giving. She gives me joy and pride and gratitude that she is my gift from the Lord - and she has grown into an amazing mother and wife and woman that loves the Lord and ALL OF HIS CHILDREN that she comes into contact with.
I know I am rambling - but imagine if I was not talking to this family member - what a slap in the face the Lord would experience - after giving me this incredible gift. I just throw it back at him and say, "She is not worthy of my time or love." How dare I?
So - I know, I can truly say to God: God, I am blessed.
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3 comments:
this was really hard for me to read. sometimes i have felt that i needed to live up to the prayer that you prayed for a sister, or become a good thing because of the fact that mom shed many bad thing tears when she found out her pregnancy. but i know that each day of my life God has worked out as He needed for His glory. the expectations of family and the world are nothing compared to the peace in His arms. i simply am nothing without being there. if today was my last, i would want you to know that i am proud of you as well. that i have always longed for the weekends that you returned. and i know that God has given me more than an earthly sister, but a sister to share in eternity with!
you know that you were wanted by all. i can't imagine mom's life, dad's life, or our whole family's life without the richness you have brought. you are our gift. and God asks you (and we too) to be nothing but what He calls you to be: His daughter. I love you! -M
I feel like I am interrupting a beautiful sisterly moment, but you guys are killing me over here.
This was absolutely precious to read.
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